Hot Cross Bunza?

Jon, I hope you're reading this.

Today I finally took the plunge: I had one of those weird log-looking things from Costco called a "Chicken Bake." It's kind of like a cross between a chicken pot pie and a Runza (or, if you went to LPS, a "Bunza"), but the big selling point is its price. For only $2.69 you can load up on two days' worth of chickeney goodness wrapped inside a golden brown, partially burnt, roll-type thing. To be honest, it's always sort of scared me, which is why every time I get a hankerin' for one of Costco's three menu items, I usually stick with the polish dog smothered in so many condiments that the bun withers in submission. But not today, my friends! Staring down the rack of oddly-shaped chicken apparati like Indiana Jones and a golden artifact, I resolved to hand over nearly three of my hard-earned dollars for what could be an entirely new concept in eating. Or heart disease.

It took a little bit of doing, but after 20 minutes and some breaks for rest, I finished off ye olde chicken bake. I could not testify as to the contents of said bake, but I can say that it was sort of like a large chickeney twinkey, if that means anything. Not a twinkie the size of the Ghostbusters' "Containment Unit," should it represent such an object, but a large one nonetheless. Am I full? Definitely. Was it worth it? We'll see, I think.

What will happen? Like most of these kind of episodes, I will likely forget everything I know and repeat the scenario several times (here's looking at you, Bill Murray) until my wife convinces me to just go back to the polish dog. If that doesn't work, she'll probably bribe me with the possibility of a churro for dessert. mmm...churro...